As a vegan, you most likely get all different types of questions about your lifestyle, about what you eat and about veganism in general. If you are not always sure how to react and answer those question, read my guidance which helps you find the right answer for the 10 most common questions for vegans. But what about dining in vegan style? How will you manage to go out with your non-vegan friends and family members to non-vegan gatherings and parties?
As you might suspect, you will probably experience some tough times hanging with non-vegans, even if they are your best friends or family members. Being invited to restaurants or events where no vegan meals are served will definitely make you feel uncomfortable or even worried because your relations will be tested.
It is understandable that other people already see you as “someone with special dietary requirements” and you are the last person who would like to come into any conflict because you made the right choice of becoming a vegan. In this article, I am going to give you a few tips on how to deal with invitations and gatherings with your non-vegan friends and family. You can even take those special dining occasions as a challenge for explaining yourself and spread an awareness about veganism.
1. Invitations to non-vegan restaurants
Being invited to a family dinner, going out with your co-workers or your friends is such a special and nice treat after several long days spent at work. But as a vegan, these invitations can turn out to be a nightmare. You might find yourself in a situation where you are not comfortable at all with the restaurant or kind of an establishment chosen as the place for your gathering.
Explain your vegan stand
What are your options in this sort of situation? In the case that the chosen restaurant is strongly against your vegan values and philosophy, the best what you can do is to kindly and honestly explain your stance. You don’t necessarily have to get into a conflict and try to convince everyone of going vegan. Be brave and stand firmly by your vegan ideas, but don’t push to hard. People who truely care about you will support you no matter what.
Remember that you don’t want to confront anyone with their food choices, nor do you want to make them feel that your diet is better than theirs. Try to explain your position clearly, not making excuses why you can’t accept the invitation. Tell them honestly that your diet requirements have changed and you are no longer comfortable with the dining place of their choice.
Have a look at a menu in advance
Another thing which you can do is to find out about the menu at the restaurant. Being informed about whats on the menu could be absolutely crucial. It might be a totally non-vegan restaurant (let’s say, a steakhouse) with no vegan meal options available. Yes, none. Not even sides which would be rare because there are always few vegan sides, such as potato wedges, fries, or just a plain green salad.
Most of the restaurants nowadays put their menus on their website, available for reading. You can try to find these menus and make yourself familiar with it. It will give you an idea of what sort of food to expect. Sometimes there might be no vegan meals listed on the menu, but the dining place still might be able to prepare something for you.
The best way how to gather more information about the restaurant is to call them in advance. Ask for someone in charge of food making process (such as a chef or a manager). If the staff is worthy to have a dinner there, they will make a special vegan dish for you or just modify something which is already on the menu. Calling one day or even several hours in advance will give you enough time to prepare yourself for a nice dining out.
By dining in a non-vegan establishment, you express a demand for vegan food which may result in adding more vegan items on a menu. Since vegan food is suitable for literally everyone, it can be you who picks a restaurant next time you dine out!
2. Hosting a party at your place
You probably think hosting a party at your own place might be an easier option. Don’t get me wrong, but it is as challenging as dining out with your non-vegan friends and family. You would be probably the only vegan out there and that would make hard for you to defend your vegan values.
Be the boss of your own party
On the other hand, the harder this could get, the better you can convert this situation in your favour and get the most out of it. This is the perfect time to wow everyone with your favourite vegan meals. If you are still not confident enough to cook a meal for others, you can prepare an easy vegan dessert. I guarantee you that everyone would admire your delicious sweet vegan treats!
If your family is attending, there is nothing better to convince them that you get enough nutrients and you don’t starve yourself. Show them with an example: make few different types of meals full of colourful pieces of vegetable or fruit, add enough protein, such as tofu or tempeh. If you want to look for some inspiration, see this amazing recipe for spicy tofu kebabs. Take this as an opportunity to familiarize them with totally new and unknown vegan ingredients!
Make sure you have something vegan to eat
When you host a gathering, you will probably try to please everyone. and encourage them to bring their favourite meals. In this case, make sure you cook enough suitable food for yourself first. You might cook something really tasty and everyone else eats it all until there will be nothing left for you!
You can also try another version of a gathering at your place. Encourage all attendants to bring one vegan or at least vegetarian meal. That’s how you will make sure everyone tries something from your vegan world. People will either hate this idea or love it. You never know until you give it a try!
3. Holidays, special events and birthdays
Holidays can be a real tough time for everyone, not only for vegans. Most of the holidays are associated with certain type of meals, going hand in hand with specific cultural or religious traditions. For instance, celebrating Christmas is associated with meat dishes, potato salad, including mayonnaise, made of eggs or maybe milk, etc. As a vegan, there are many traps you can avoid by being better prepared.
Make a new tradition for yourself
One great thing is to start a completely new tradition, just for yourself. After some time, other family members might follow you. Instead of roast chicken, turkey or fried fish you can prepare plant-based alternatives. Make a meatless roasted pumpkin, eggplant, or squash. Prepare vegan lasagne or other types of pasta with a rich creamy sauce, add some baked or gravy potato on the side or you can also add salad, fries, marinade, dips and other small things as a side to make your plate a bit fuller.
You can bring your own vegan meals, try not to make nasty comments about other people plates. If there is someone sitting with a huge piece of meat in front of you, avoid criticizing their meals and if possible, change your seat. Keep in mind that somebody worked very hard to prepare the meals for other guests. You wouldn’t feel great if someone made negative comments about your plant-based meals, would you?
Check a menu at weddings and other events
When you attend an event where the set menu will be served, you cannot do much to change it. If there is no vegan option available, You can easily end up with just mashed potatoes, iceberg lettuce salad with no dressing, or fries. What is a little trick in those situations? Eat before you get there! Don’t be an angry vegan in the corner who just hates everyone for their different food choices!
Just to make sure, call the caterer before an event. They might prepare something vegan for you, you never know. Some chefs might even see this as a great challenge for them and will enjoy creating a special vegan meal for you. Remember that even food which looks vegan may contain some ‘secret’ animal ingredients, so don’t hesitate to ask about anything!
4. Dining out
Dining out can be truly intimidating for any vegan, especially when you don’t know the establishment. The best advise is to remain calm, polite and ask just about everything. There is no need to be rude, impolite or angry at the waiter. They are people who just work there and might have no clue about veganism. Not everyone is informed about a vegan lifestyle, so keep calm and let them take your vegan order.
Be friendly to the server
First of all, you have to spend some time reading a menu. When there is nothing that looks like a vegan meal or could possibly be modified in a vegan form, you have to ask for help. And here you have a chance to make a server your ally. Don’t be shy or timid and ask just about everything that is not clear to you.
As I already mentioned, the server might not be familiar with veganism, so you have to spell everything clearly without shouting or getting angry because there is nothing vegan on a menu. Trust me, its not their fault that the restaurant management or the chef didn’t think about us, fellow vegans. If the waiter has no idea what veganism is, explain that you don’t eat any animal products, including honey, eggs, and gelatin.
Ask the server about all ‘hidden’ ingredients and about any possible traces. They might use the same pan just for everything – for frying meat and vegetables without cleaning the pan. If the server doesn’t know, don’t hesitate to send him back to a kitchen or speak with a manager.
Check out for a better service
Dining in a fully vegan restaurant is ideal and there won’t be any problems with service. However, when you dine in a non-vegan or non-vegetarian restaurant, be ready to ask for a vegan option. And as you suspect, this sometimes doesn’t go very smoothly. Not all restaurant are super friendly or willing to accommodate your special requirements.
If you encounter an unfriendly waiter or staff, consider writing a negative review as to let other vegans and non-vegans know about the service you have experienced. If its a decent establishment, your bad review will surely encourage them to improve their service and dining conditions. Don’t be afraid to speak out and share your experience!
On the other hand, if chef accommodates your inquiries, don’t forget to let the waiter know about your satisfaction. Ask the server to give your compliments to the chef and make sure you leave a tip for great service!
Turn a vegan dining in an outstanding experience
You don’t have to be afraid to accept your friends or family’s invitations for dining out or being part of traditional events and gatherings. Stay calm and explain your dietary requirements. Most people are very understanding!
Whether you host your own gathering or go out for a dinner, with my tips you will be able to handle any situation smoothly without stirring up unnecessary conflicts! Have fun while dining and enjoy your food in a great vegan style!
Klara Walterova
Klara is a professional freelance writer for hire. She offers web content, blog posting, ghostwriting and copywriting. She writes for a healthy lifestyle, wellness and travel websites. She focuses on veganism and the vegan diet. When she's not writing, she develops new tasty vegan recipes, travels the world or plays with her cats. Please contact her for her online writing services on her website writtenbyvegan.com or visit her Instagram profile @writtenbyvegan.